11 Crucial Facts that Will Help You Live in Peace and Set You Free
Lessons I learned from 12 Rules of Life from Jordan Peterson
Being happy is our birthright. We all deserve to be happy. But to be happy we are going after the wrong things like money and materials. Happiness comes once peace and freedom are achieved. Once we are at peace with ourselves, we are free. We are free from trying to please others, we are free from our past and we are also free from our future. Because we are at peace with what is already around us.
So let us have a look at 11 facts that can help you to find peace.
1. Look like a winner, act like a winner and become a winner
I am sure you heard the saying “Act it till you make it”. A good posture, head up and back straight, is a very simple way to increase your confidence. There are many studies that show, just good posture alone can help with serotonin (aka Happy Hormone) release. So to have the confidence of the winner, you have to walk like a winner.
2. Being a little bit selfish is good
If we don’t think about our own wellbeing and our own mental health, how can we offer support for the people we care for? We can’t always think of others, we have to think of ourselves as well. Eat the food YOU want to eat, go to places YOU want to go and do the things YOU want to do, be with people YOU want to be with. And it is OK. You need to care for yourself as you would care for your loved ones. It is OK to prioritize yourself and your needs.
3. If you are happy all the time, there is something wrong
Being happy all the time is an impossible task. You can’t always try to do what makes you happy, because a lot of the time you will have to do the things that are good for you. And what is good for you, does not necessarily come with joy and laughter. For example, going to the gym and working out for 40 minutes instead of watching your favorite TV show on Netflix.
4. Have your friends close and your supportive friends closer
What type of friends do you have? Do they always want to do something fun? What would they do, how would they react when they see you moving away from your goals and dreams? Would they encourage you to get back on track? You can have friends around you during your hard times. But are those friends actively doing something to help you? Or are they just there to show their presence?
Make friends who would support and encourage you. A good friend would not tolerate your self-destructive behaviors and your excuses. They encourage you to get up on your feet and get back on track.
5. There is always someone better than you and will always be
This is not a problem unless you see it as a problem. A self-criticism is an ugly tool once you start comparing yourself to others. On the other hand, self-criticism is good, if you compare yourself to your previous version a few days, weeks, or months ago. Always judge yourself against your own prior accomplishments. Comparing yourself to others will prevent you from seeing the real progress you made. When you start comparing your results to your past once, you will keep moving forward. So, the real question is what can you do today that can make you better than yesterday?
6. Life is unfair and it always will be
Life is unfair to everyone. It doesn’t pick and choose. If you sit down and look for something or someone to blame for the injustice, you will find many. But will this do any good to you? How will you benefit from it? No matter what happens to you, no matter what difficulties you face, you will always have to aim for good and move on. Otherwise, you will be stuck in the past and blame everyone for its insufficiency. Do you really think successful people got it easy? Or perseverance carried them forward? Sure, they face their share of failure. But they moved on. They didn’t sit down and feel sorry for themselves. You should do the same and stop the blame game.
7. Instant pleasures will result in an unstable future
The joy you get from quick fixes will disappear quicker than its arrival. Once it disappears, it will be replaced with agitation, anxiety, and despair. Alcohol, drugs, gambling, excessive eating; all offer some sort of pleasure, but that pleasure comes with a big cost. The cost of your health and your life. The long-lasting pleasure is the one that takes a long time to come. You sacrifice and make hard decisions to have that pleasure. But once you have it, it comes with long-lasting fulfillment and satisfaction. The feeling of that pleasure will be priceless.
8. Do yourself a favor and be honest (at least to yourself)
Being honest and truthful is one of the most important values a human being can have. Telling lies is already a very bad attribute to have, but lying to yourself will have devastating effects on your life. Lying to yourself is extremely dangerous because you actually believe that lie. Chasing after unrealistic goals; Denying your ignorance and not accepting new knowledge are the biggest lies we can tell ourselves. The cure to fooling ourselves is simply being honest, when we are face to face with our conscience.
9. Listen like you never heard it before
Listening skill is a crucial skill to have. It is even more crucial than talking skills. The solution to every problem starts with understanding the problem. Without effective listening skills, you have no chance of solving any problems. Listening to others attentively also shows how much you value them. You need to listen like you know absolutely nothing. Listen quietly, listen without interrupting, listen by acknowledging what the other person said, listen like you never heard it before.
10. Be very clear with your goals and have the same clarity for your problems
The journey without a destination will be a very boring and daunting task. Once you are clear with your destination, every step will have a purpose. You will know that each small step is a task that is accomplished. If your goals are not crystal clear, you won’t know when you achieve them. How will you know when your goals are achieved? What steps do you need to take? When will you consider the job is done? What actions will indicate that you are on the right track? What will confirm the accomplishment? Be clear and have peace of mind.
11. Every crumb of joy worth celebrating
If we can’t embrace and be grateful for our small wins then it would be a very long wait for a big celebration (in most cases that celebration may never happen). It doesn’t matter how small or big that moment is, you should make every effort to celebrate your small wins. Every moment in our life is important and we can only notice a fraction of those moments. So make time to notice and acknowledge those times. If you don’t, you will miss the moments that bring peace and fulfillment.
Final Say …
What are your tips to find peace and fulfillment in life?
